I mentioned I have a dragon as a pet. His name is Mordred. Erebus got him during his bachelor party-come-hunt thing. Apparently, he wrestled it into submission and now he's its master.
My husband is so awesooooome
But there's a problem. It's not feeding or housing him, he's not a very big dragon so we just got some dudes in to make some stables (and then told them not to tell anyone on pain of death and stuff). Well actually it's kind of related to feeding him. It's more like what happens after.
Mucking out a dragon is the WORST THING EVER. It's the single grossest thing I have ever done, and I have crawled down a Nydus tunnel to kill the Zerg coming up the other way. How does a creature prduce that much crap? Also I'm pretty sure he wants a toilet by now, or at least a river. Ugh. The smell sticks to you too. It's pervasive. You wear heavy-duty clothing on top, like all hazmat shit, and you still smell of crap afterwards. It's like cigarettes.
Thankfully the smell washes out. So it's not a total loss. ;)
So THAT'S who was making that odor. Jeez, I can smell that even through my diving helmet. You guys should get an air freshener for the stable for the sake of everyone's sanity.
ReplyDeleteI don't think Mordred would appreciate pine scent though. XD
DeleteOn a serious note, we'd let him roam free more but this is the middle of Manhattan and bad things would happen. So we're kind of stuck with it I guess, unless we let him out to poop in a lake or something.
You think you have it bad? Ever tried house training, like, a whole pack of corgi puppies at once? Not even Shao Kahn's old tiger trainers can handle them, and they're the toughest in the profession!
ReplyDeleteOn the plus side, that Rafflesia thing doesn't want much. Just some water and sunglight and it seems to do just fine. And all the Metool wants is some Lego's and it's happy.
I'm truthfully beginning to consider seeing if his leavings have any value as a fertilizer, both for the good of our community (but mostly so other people will engage themselves in cleaning it up for us.)
ReplyDeleteOh man, Erebus, that's actually a great idea! People line up to buy cow poop, imagine the demand for DRAGON poop! Probably makes plants grow like twice as big, hot damn.
DeleteErebus you're a genius!
DeleteWE'LL MAKE MILLIONS
They'll look quite glorious next to our billions.
DeleteMORE MONEY FOR THE SVILZERIAN EMPIRE
DeleteI guess I have it easy! Shelby can be a little stinky when it's time to clean her stable but I'm sure a dragon must be much more of a problem!
ReplyDeleteWe have Worker 8 now though and he's like a butler. He's been doing stable duty since Christmas. So awesome. :D
Ah, mucking out the stables, now that takes me back. After a full day of scrubbing the floors, hauling lumber, and digging tunnels while fighting off the occasional Giant Albino Himalayan Bull Worm, there was nothing like mucking out the stables to unwind. Just you, a shovel, and plenty of time to ponder existence and your place in it. And horse manure.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely one of my favorite chores, right up there with weeding the garden and putting out salt for the sentient rocks.
Sincerely,
Father Squid